BOOK REVIEW!

So it may surprise or not surprise you that I am kind of obsessed with books. Like so obsessed that I totally judge people with e-readers. I learned to read when I was like four and all my friends parents would show me off and be like, read the newspaper, child, and I would and they would all die and be jealous I wasn't their kid. Probably one of the reasons I'm still so annoying. But I read so fast that buying books is kind of a waste of money especially when that money could go towards shoes to read my books in. So I have rediscovered the library. [We actually had to switch libraries when I was a little kid because I read all the kids books there. That was at the OC library before it turned into some weird church/skatepark hybrid.]  Sooo anyway, I just finished reading ROOM by EMMA DONAHUGHE. [don't know if that's how you spell it, don't feel like googling her name.] I have this thing lately where I read the first two chapters, get anxiety and read the last six chapters or so  next. Then I work my way backwards through the book. [If I was going to use my psych degree on myself and really why not, I paid 30k for it (well, will be paying 30k for it when my student loans find out about my three jobs that barely pay my car payment and keep me in target wedges) I would say this is because I am trying to deal or not deal with a situation in my life that I can't control and don't know the ending to and I am afraid and it gives me bad anxiety and this is translating into my literary pursuits.] Anyway, enough about that, this is a book review.
      This book is about a little boy, Jack, and his mom who are locked in a room. The mom was kidnapped when she was in college and now they live in a shack and the guy who kidnapped her kind of like you know rapes her and so she has this little boy who has never been outside and doesn't know what real life is. Or what people are or what outside is. You kind of like them when they are in the room but then they escape  [I won't give you details and ruin it for you] and then they have to deal with things like rain and real life. The mom has to readjust to real life and the kid is totally overwhelmed by everything like shoes and sun and having to wear a mask because he's never been exposed to diseases. It doesn't really go so well. The kid is like totally obsessed with his mom because they did everything together in the room like taking baths and sleeping together. But it's like, why? That kid is six. He's way too old for to be taking naked baths with your naked mom for no reason. It just seems inappropriate. Which brings me to my next issue with this book: breastfeeding. The mom still breastfeeds Jack. Even though he is six. They have food, they have drinks. There is no actual reason for it. And it just makes me uncomfortable. It reminds me of that british lady on the news awhile back who was like breastfeeding her seven year old and everyone was like ABUSE! Like I don't know about calling it abuse but it is definitely super weird and gross and inappropriate. If your child can talk, it shouldn't be breastfeeding. I get it's like natural and old as the times and everything but I will never do it. It just grosses me out and makes me uncomfortable. I get there are supposedly super benefits but like put it in a bottle. That probably is a real big clue I'm not ready for kids myself, but usually when I make up my mind about something, it's done. Sorry future baby, bottles for life. Hope you don't turn out to be a slow, underachieving stoner or a scary kid who shoots up his high school like that psycho in We Need to Talk about Kevin [coincidentally will be my next book/movie review].

I know you can't wait.